Author: Tim

11:46pm: A fair few housemates are playing cricket in the living room. Kate walks from the bathroom to the bedroom, and says goodnight. Christie is batting, but Dogs catches her. The bat is a wooden spoon. Glenn’s turn to bat, Hotdogs bowls to him. He hits a 6. Gianna is watching, perhaps fielding. Greg is also fielding. Glenn is out for 18. Into the bedroom, Kate, Michelle, Dean and Dave are in the bedroom. Dean keeps asking Dave if he could fall asleep, and he keeps saying yes. Dean, in a clever way, says to the others that perhaps personal tasks have started for some housemates in the house. No real reply from the others, so we go back to the cricket. Gianna is batting. But she’s out. Greg into bat, and he’s hit a six straight away. Christie says she is a bit keen on a spa. Gianna is back batting, and she gets 16 before she gets out. If you hit it, you get one run. However, hit it over a fielder and it’s six.

12:02am: We are greeted by Tim showering naked. Cut out to the living room, where Greg starts giving Christie a massage. Glenn gives them an idea though, and Christie grabs the flour and runs to Tim’s bed and puts flour in it everywhere. Dean says to Hotdogs “If she did that to me, I’d get her back so bad.” Hotdogs agrees. Tim is in the kitchen now, having a drink. Dean, Greg and Glenn are just chucking a ball back and forth.

12:16am: Christie is still playing catch with the guys, and almost knocks out a light. They all laugh about it. Geneva, Michael, Michelle seem like they are asleep. Perhaps even Dave. Lots of laughing going on in the room though. Tim has entered the room, and now goes to the toilet. Hasn’t got into bed or checked his bed yet. When Tim emerges, Christie comes over and says goodnight. He gets into bed, puts his feet right nito the bed and suddenly realises that something is wrong. He gets out and surveys the damage. He says “Who did this!?” Roar of laughter from everyone. Christie comes over and after Tim asks who did it, see simply laughs and says “Not me!” Everyone cracks up even more and starts repeating her “Not me!” line. After a bit more laughter, she decides she’ll help him clean it up. Although she gets bored very quickly and simply starts throwing it only him. Tim gets Christie on the floor and starts jumping on her. The guys are laughing and saying that poor Tim only just had a shower. Dean and Hotdogs say that he needs to start playing fire with fire. Tim just simply climbs into Christie’s bed and says ‘bedtime.’ Another roar of laughter from the boys. Christie says for Tim to get out, but to no avail.

12:28am: Back into the house and lights have been turned off. Christie comes into the bedroom and goes for the toilet. Silence elsewhere in the room. First night where everyone is in bed before the end of Uplate. Christie goes back to the couch and tries to get some sleep under the bright lights.

12:57am: Tim has got up and come out to lecture Christie about the earlier incident. He says he is not looking forward to clearing it up tomorrow. Christie says that she will do it. Tim reckons that the joke is really on her, and that while the others were laughing at Tim they were also laughing at her. Tim, in his lecturer voice, asks her what she has learnt from all this. Tim tells her to not do any other jokes like this again. Christie wonders whether Tim will talk to other practical jokers. Tim says he doesn’t mind that jokes just between the two, which are easy to clean up, are fine. It’s just when others are bought in it makes Tim a bit angry. Anyway, lecture is over and he is back off to sleep. Christie sits there in total amazement for a while, then rolls over and heads back to bed.

1:02am: Tim is back explaining himself again. Christie keeps trying to interrupt, and Tim says ‘shutup’ a couple of times. He’s not happy now. He repeats his earlier lecture. Greg is looking on also out on the couch. Tim says this is the end point – no more jokes. Christie seems to think she is taking the slack for everyone else. Greg thinks that the jokes have no gone too far.

11:40: Most housemates are gathered around the new bowling alley, which has been opened tonight for the housemates to enjoy, but only for 2 hours. Glenn says that it seems to have been more than two hours, and that Big Brother must be giving them longer because the swearing in the live task was a lot better this week. Cut to Gianna and Christie who are talking about boys in the reward room. Gianna says she pinched Dave’s bum earlier. Christie says she wants to jump Greg. Apparently Christie has already kissed Dave tonight. Gianna says that she bets he has a hard on. The girls go on to complain about some lollies that their eating. Christie is complaining about the wine, so is Gianna. Christie is also stuffing her face with watermelon. They decide to head back out to the main house. Kate has emerged from the diary room where she has been treated for a sore foot. I don’t know what happened, but Christie is apologising. Kate says that it’s not her fault however. They all just continue to bowl, not talking in much depth at all. Out in the spa, Hotdogs, Dean and Geneva are in there. Dean is complaining about how people who watch vote out the ones that provide a bit of conflict. He can’t understand it and is saying it aloud. Geneva asks them, if she’s still here, to remind her on Wednesday of a family birthday she would like to remember. Gianna comes out and sings “I’m so drunk” or something to that affect. Gianna says she loves it when Geneva laughs with her/at her. Inside, Tim is being beaten up by the “T Birds”, who include Greg, Dave and Glenn. It’s all in good fun, and Gianna comes and tries to help Tim out. In fighting, Tim kicks some furniture around, prompting Big Brother to come over and suggest they don’t throw furniture as the nurse would rather not see any other patients for the night. Back out to the spa, Christie has now come to talk to the boys. Michael, who has joined the boys, says to her she looks great in that top. Christie says she knows, and says it’s cause she has great tits. “There’s no denying it…” Gianna comes and cuddles Hotdogs again. Dean pronounces that he had a great night’s sleep last night. Hotdogs says he had a shocker.

12:12am: Gianna gives Dave a cuddle while he waits for his bowl. She keeps trying to touch him, get close to him, and he’s having NOTHING of it. It’s classic television. Gianna tells the guys that AMF stands for “Always Means Fun”. Oh dear, she must be plastered! Christie gets a strike. Tim goes for a bowl with his pants down. Christie races after him and tries to bring his boxers down too. Big Brother announces the bowling area is no closed, and the roller door comes down. Christie starts singing a song which makes absolutely no sense.

12:28am: A heap of housemates are cleaning up the kitchen. They are saying that the food wasn’t really hot. Christie goes on to grab the trophy, and gives a fake speech full of rubbish. Gianna enters the lounge and Christie tells her not to interput, but Gianna fires back “I don’t give a f***”. Lovely. Gianna is trying to get Greg’s attention for Christie, but he’s ignoring them. She runs back and says to Dave she only wants a kiss and a cuddle. Dave says “Yeh”, not confidently, and basically runs down to the couch! Gianna does a little high school laugh. The girls (Christie and Gianna) suddenly disapear, and Dave dives for the couch and makes a point to sit inbetween other housemates. Angela starts telling him ‘not to be suprised if she comes out’, but we are taken to a comm break.

12:38am: Gianna has changed into a nurses outfit. Oh dear. Christie is walking round in underwear. I wonder what she’ll change into. Great, she comes out in nothing else but her underwear. They tell them to go out and show the spa boys. As they go, Dave says to Angela “Oh no. My mates are going to be laughing so hard at me.” Gianna decides to do a pole dance. To be clear, the nurse outfit is FAR too short, and she really bends over, and the couch are heard to yell out “I think we saw a bit too much there.” Gianna keeps saying “I am so drunk.” Dave says again to Angela “I would never let my misses do that.” The T Birds and Tim get up and start making music for the girls to dance too. Gianna decides she needs to go to the toilet. Christie does a big runup, and then falls down completely.

12:52am: They are still dancing, and the couch aren’t evening watching anymore. Gianna goes “Oh my god, this is on television.” Christie gives Glenn a nice close up show. Gianna comes over and does likewise. THey then both play with him at the same time. Glenn tells her to just relax and take her bra off. BB calls Kate into the diary room. Gianna is craving for attention here, saying she is feeling a bit silly in this outfit, but if someone said she looked sexy she will be fine. Tim comes back from the spa, after getting kicked in the balls from Christie accidently. Christie asks him to give her a look. He declines, but says it wasn’t just the one, it was the twins as well.

1:05am: Gianna is leaving the spa area now and heads back inside. Dean recalls that when she first entered the house, Dean told her he had a girlfriend, and so Gianna replied “Oh, I won’t flirt with you then!” Gold! They go onto discuss how many weeks are left, and thus how many intruders etc will come in. Michael says that he was very suprised to hear Dean’s name read out when Nelson and Constance also got banished to the punishment. Dean says that he was as suprised as anyone.

1:17am: Gianna is saying she might change back into her normal clothes. Angela reckons that she has worn that before. Gianna says she hasn’t! Dave tells her that she revealed a bit tonight. She says “Did I!” It seems Christie has got changed into her nightgear. Dave says he’s no fun cause he’s sober. She gives him a kiss on the cheek, if that, and says “Yeh thats alright”. He says he doesn’t want to lead her on. She says he’s not leading her on, she’s doing it to him. Kate comes out of the diary room with her foot straped I think, and Dave says “Wasn’t it your right foot, not your left?” Gets a few laughs. Christie wonders how much the microphone is worth. Angela says some reckon $7K, otherwise several thousand. Tim says he’s given his a name, Susie. This gets a great laugh from the people seated. BB comes on and says that Gianna and Michelle are not wearing their microphone, a $5000 fine is given between the two. Christie comes in and asks what Dave said to her earlier.

1:31am: The girls are now both dressed for bed. On her way out of the bedroom, Gianna apologises to Michelle for talking to her while they had their mics off. She then goes outside and apologises to everyone. Gianna and Christie wonder if they will nude up in the reward room. Giana then says “I know who I want to get nude with, but he doesn’t want to”. She goes out to the spa, and the camera zooms in on Dave and then he says “Whats everyone looking at me for!” Gianna outside is discussing who to give the chores to who. Hotdogs wonders if giving Angela the shopper/chef is the best idea. Hotdogs says that she won’t buy any booze. Dean keeps saying he would hate the housekeeper job. She then apologises for the fine out to the people in the spa, then heads back inside. Tim decides he’s going to have to check his balls to see if everything is ok. Glenn tells Christie that he likes Kate, but then says “thats a secret.” Yeh, it’ll be out within an hour. Out at the spa, Greg approaches, and so they start talking about him in a negative tone. He doesn’t even realise! They have to tell him the joke. Glenn jumps into the spa and joins Dean and Michael. Christie comes over and says goodnight to them. Angela takes all the costumes that they were provided with back to the diary room for BB. Hotdogs is wishing Constance was still in the house so she could cut his hair. At 1:47am, Dreamworld says goodnight.

A very dirty night in the BB house!

I join Uplate at 11.56pm, and Mike tells me I’ve missed out on a lot of interesting stuff – doh! Anwyay Geneva and Christie are in the kitchen having a late night snack. They plan to get Glenn to kiss Christie by initiating a game of spin the bottle, but Christie says she’s not feeling anything from any of the guys. Geneva says they’re all randy and want vagina but they don’t go anywhere near it (her mould). Christie wonders why they can’t be “hey babeh” and sleazy. They say Glenn is up for it but Glenn is not Christie’s type of boy.. and Hotodgs is just crap… just a player. They agree he doesn’t want some girl to fall in love with him. Christie says all the boys are probably scared of Gianna because she’d fall in love with them… and Gianna couldn’t join this conversation because she doesn’t do random hookups – well only once and she felt guilty about it. Christie and Geneva have no setbacks, and Mike interups the conversation.

Mike tells us the reason for the up late auction is so people in WA, SA and NT can play something via SMS… yeah right. $$$ ding ding ding $$$

12.05am – Mike reminds us that when Geneva first entered the house she said she found Christie the hottest. Meanwhile Christie is on to something about Glenn and him being “on a break” with his girlfriend. The girls sit quietly for a moment before Geneva suggests Christie corners a guy – but not Greg, because apparently Greg doesn’t like her. They agree Dave would be up for it – they shouldn’t go for the innocent ones – for the ones who would. Hotdogs would do it but Christie wouldn’t kiss Hotdogs. Geneva thinks its funny if she hooked up tonight. Geneva suggests they use the excuse “it was a dare” to kiss one of the boys. They both go to the toilet at the same time. Meanwhile in the spa the other housemates are chatting – it’s hard to hear over the spa motor. They are doing a bit of singing. Is Hotdogs wearing a wig? His hair is out of control. Each of the HMs are taking turns singing a song.

12.11am – The talk in the spa turns to masturbating. Greg certainly has opened up on the subject – he talks of the shock of moving into the house and sleeping (in the same room) with a whole lot of other people. We cut back to Geneva and Christie in the lounge room, who are still talking about hook up personalities and dynamics in the house. Geneva says she might be going on Sunday she needs to make the most of it – Christie says they will have a wild friday and saturday night. Geneva is angry about the kissing thing now – she feels there are boundaries but there aren’t supposed to be any. Christie thinks they don’t need to worry about it.

12.19am – The girls are discussing whether Greg is gay. They say he never talks about girls like David does. They go to check if he is sitting next to another guy in the spa. The girls go outside to see everyone. Christie says quite loudly – are you gay!? No one hears but Geneva who cracks up. They announce their plan to divide the alcohol up and do shots to get real drunk – if the chicks don’t drink all day they can get really hammered. The spa housemates aren’t too keen on the idea. The girls eventually go inside and inspect the model they have made for this week’s task. The toe has come off. We move now to the sauna where most of the girls are… and Greg joins them, only for 10 minute he assures them. Glenn joins them shortly after. Mike tells us the girls were talking about Greg just as he walked in. They notice Glenn does his hair just like Greg and he does a weird face when he brushes his hair. They say it’s his grease face (John Travolta). Glenn starts talking about how its easier for guys in the house to masturbate.

12.33am – The HMs in the sauna are talking about random things. Glenn splashes some water around, to the annoyance of Kate. They are all looking foward to music when they leave the house. Back in the lounge room Hotdogs is saying he can’t wait to spoon or have a root. Chrsitie says she’s been trying to find some one to spoon with but no one! She says it doesn’t matter if she finds them attractive in the house – because she’s not attracted to anybody. Hotdogs says he is the same, but Christie doesn’t believe him. Hotdogs says there are parts of people he’s attracted to. Christie says “are you attracted to my parts?”, Geneva cracks up. Hotdogs says there is a girl in Perth he likes and he’s glad he “has her” (is anyone in this house single?). Christie hopes she has a fanbase outside of the house – hot little guys. Christie wants a spooning competition/companion. Chrsitie strips off to do her legs. They talk about who showers naked, Christie checks and David still has his pants on in the shower, much to her dissapointment.

12.45am- Geneva asks Angela if she’d kiss her. Angela says no but Geneva begs for a kiss. Angela is worried she’s becoming too conservative. Glenn would have liked them to kiss. Meanwhile in the bedroom Geneva is telling Hotdogs how she’s trying to get a score happening. Christie, now topless, asks Geneva if she wants to have a wet tshirt contest. Michelle says Hotdogs has been spanking her ass as she walks by now. Geneva asks Michelel “would you kiss me if I asked you to”. Gianna says its a competition but Christie says it’s just facts – they want to know who would kiss Geneva. Michelle says maybe if she was in the moment but not right now.

Later, the girls are still on their competition to get as many people as possible. Geneva is eager to win and wants a kiss from Gianna. Gianna is all giggles but is giving it a pass. Geneva says if she’s not good enough for Gianna she’s not good enough for anyone. Hotdogs is making himself a coffee while the girls debate the progress of the competition. Geneva goes out to the spa and asks the boys in the spa. David is telling some blokey story about getting drunk with his mates. Dean tells a story about his friend who phones up random people to talk to them while he’s drunk. Back in the house, Christie explains it’s not a competition, they are just testing how the boys in the house are trying to hook up in the house – only when they have alcohol in them.

In the middle of the breainteaser Christie starts pashing Greg!!! Doh, adbreak.

12.57am- We find out Hotdogs pashed Geneva and Geneva kissed Kate during the break. FFS Channel 10! Apparently Greg kisses the best in the house. Geneva scored 4 and Chrsitie scored 2. 2 of Geneva’s were boys though. Christie says she’d rather not kiss Michael, and bangs her arm on the side of the couch. Hotdogs is enjoying his coffee. They wonder where Big Brother is – he’s having a break, he’s having a kit kat. Hotdogs really wants some chocolate and thinks everyone will be surprised at his shopping. Greg says his shopping will be really crap. They discuss what money they have for alcohol in the budget. Greg wonders if they have an RSA on the housemates (responsible service of alcohol). He thinks maybe BB isn’t giving them much alcohol because they “win” it – also if they give too much alcohol the HMs could possible sue BB? Geneva thinks its because when they are drunk they don’t respect Big Brother. Greg is making bread, meanwhile. Talk moves back to the girl’s experiment and Greg thinks it went well. Greg explains he doesn’t mind kissing on the spot like that if it was to make a point – but in different context it would be different.

Sigh, during the ad break we missed a whole lot of full frontal nudity.

1.17am – Kate is lying in a precarious position in the sauna with Angela over the top of her. Angela is plucking Kate’s bikini line. They discuss the whole Michelle, Gianna, every other girl in the hosue situation (again!). Kate thinks about Tim again but Angela is concerned about Tim’s views on things like unions – he’s very defined by it. Kate says its interesting to hear about it. Angela says we could all read a book and be educated it but she’s more interested in people who have done it and have physical experiences on it.

1.24am – In the lounge room Glenn and Michael are talking about “masturbation courtesy” – ie. a guy masturbating in a shared bed with another guy. Michael says he was going to bring a doo-rag in for it. They talk about the musky smell in one of the toilets from one of the guys masturbating in there. Michael says he’s the “money shot expert”. They say its been 11 days. David says he didn’t masturbate in the twin holding room either – much to the confusion of Greg. They joke about putting a towel over your head and going into the toilet to masturbate. Glenn leaves apparently to jerk off, Michael says there is lube in the top draw of some dresser in the bedroom. Glenn gets some of the lub and moves into the toilet. Who knows what he’s doing in there! The boys are plotting something to do to him… but it doesn’t seem they are going to go through with it. Michael says 2 weeks will be a good run with him. Greg says he’s comfortable with it right now. Hotdogs says if there was a girl he liked and wasn’t getting anything back he’d jerk off. Some one fats, and they all fan it out with pillows.

The girls emerge from the diary room. Glenn returns and says it didn’t happen – he was “under too much pressure”. Everyone starts talking over each other. The girls say they can offer visual aid to Glenn if he wants to jerk off. Glenn says he was thinking pure filth but nothing happened… he was half way through and had to have a piss… thats how much dedication there was. They ask what he was thinking about but Mike butts in.

1.34am – They are all discussing their wanking technique. Glenn says he’s a good wanker but not a fast wanker. Geneva says she’d fully visualise a situation. Michelle wonders how Glenn could just instantly start having a wank. Michael is talking about having his microphone on while masturbating – he didn’t want the squish noises. Hotdogs reminds them they can’t show a hard penis on TV – but he’d rather do it infront of the camera instead of the camera showing it from behind. Michael asks why can’t the girls just “double click”, but Michelle says the whole excitment would make it a lot more noticable. The boys start mimicing orgasm noises. They ask Glenn if there is some one in the house he would especially like to get with – they would be the visual aid.

Talk moves onto various items like feeding the animals. Michael says he needs to “get one out” so he doens’t wake up having sex with his mattress again. He says it’s not like at home where he has the lube on one side and the rag on the other. He says he likes watching sports while masturbating. David says he likes porn. And on that image in your mind at 1.42am, Dreamworld says goodnight.