I know the feeling. Except I'm too gutless to ever actually go on a date when I am asked out. I think it's not unusual to come of as confident in one area of your life and feel shy in another area of your life. People give me compliments at work about how passionate and strong I am and I'm so shy and nervous in my personal life. And I hate compliments
As an update I ended up texting before I went to bed last night just explaining that I'd rather have an honest answer than nothing at all. I got a text back saying that they didn't think we had much in common and that it was probably best if we didn't meet up again. So while appreciated the honesty and it's certainly an easier pill to swallow than nothing at all it's exposed a lot of my insecurities and brought up a lot of past feelings. It seems whenever I put myself out there like this it ends in failure.
Two of the OCPD characteristics that resonate with me are unusually high personal standards and preoccupation with perfectionism to the point where the goal of a task is lost. Can't help but feel that when it comes to dating I set a high standard for myself that I fear saying or doing the wrong thing so much that I'm almost void of personality.