Day 5 FNL

The fourth season of FNL kicked off with an “Out Of This World” theme. Starting the theme of predictibility nice and early this season, Mike Goldman opened the show with the exact same joke he make on 2007’s FNL premiere, saying they’ve been gone 9 months and asking if Bree’s had a baby. She hasn’t. A bit more about the hosts private lives. The boys give Bree crap about dating Bodie. Congratulations to Fitzy on his wedding.

As the action starts the housemates show up in the yard in green tights and silver skirts. BB tells each housemate they each have to sit on a slime-filled balloon with the last to pop their balloon out of the games before it even starts. After all the HMs burst their balloons (Rima loses), BB tells them he was just joking and hands out towels for them “to dry Uranus”. BB also announces that this year there will be only one prize for winning FNL – $20,000 cash.

We’re then introduced to the first of a cavalcade of stupid new FNL characters. Fitzy’s new character is introduced as Bryce Fitzberg, a former US Navy Seal turned private eye who predicts that Saxon will win because of his inside knowledge of the alien world. Bree asks what happened to Madam Fitzy to which Fitzy replies “She died… of rabies”

Back in the arena the first game is standing on a platform which slowly moves from horizontal to vertical. The blokes are up first and early losers are Nobbi, who took out Ben on his way out. In the end it was a photo finish with Saxon winning by a fraction of a second. When it comes to the girl’s turn Rima was first to slide down the wall while Renee and Alice held out for an impressive spell before Alice finally emerges as the winner.

As the winners, Alice and Saxon get to choose the teams for round 2 with an alternate pick. Alice selects Travis (who exclaims “Picked first? This is so not like school!”), Rebecca, Rory, Dixie and finally Bianca. Saxon chose Nobbi, Renee, Ben, David and was left with Brigitte. Rima wasn’t included in the selections due to a toe injury in round 1.

The second round is “Space Invaders” which requires one team to hop along an obstacle course one-by-one holding a giant star while the other team operate rows of “space junk” to knock the players down. Alice’s team goes first and make a good run of it. Watching Bianca hopping really makes you understand why she calls her breasts a curse. Alice’s team complete the course in 2:30. Between heats, another of FNL’s ridiculous new characters is revealed. This time it’s Nigel the Ninja.

Saxon’s team picks up the usual second team advantage and completes the course in 1:18, ending the game for the opposing team. BB tells Saxon’s team to split into 2 evenly-weighted teams and Brigitte quickly grabs Nobbi and Saxon, leaving David, Renee and Ben to team up against them.

The third game is Alien v Predator. The first team (the Aliens) are in individual foam suits and have to steal a ‘funky dreadlock’ from the second team who are all bundled together in one big foam suit (The Predator). First to compete are David, Renee and Ben who manage to flog all the dreadlocks in 0:55. Despite Predator being able to hold Saxon off for a little while Brigitte, Nobbi and Saxon come through with the hair in 0:50.

In true FNL form it’s then time for a Second Chance Round with all the eliminated housemates racing along a slippery tarp on their butts. Alice is a clear winner and earns her way back into the games. BB again says he needs two equally weighted teams and Saxon jumps on Alice leaving Nobby to pair up with Brigitte.

To fill time we’re introduced to yet another stupid FNL character, Jim Shorts, who’s played my Mike Goldman and reads us the news from the week in an annoying voice.

Round four involves one housemate pedalling a spaceship along a tight-rope while their partner clings onto the bottom and grabs balloons they pass along the way. Things go pear-shaped quickly when Saxon gets a bit too turned on by the space ship idea and speeds off along the tight-rope and tips the whole contraption over confusing the hosts, the ninjas and Big Brother in the process. Eventually they cut to a break and come back to announce Saxon and Alice have been disqualified. BB announces this by saying “Saxon, as the pilot your job was only to drive the space ship. You collected orbiting planets and stars. You also managed to break Big Brother’s aircraft”.

While setting up for the final game they play a game on stage which they dub “Are You Smarter Than A Bree Amer?” They pull some dude called Phil the Council Worker out of the crowd and get him to compete against Bree in a trivia game on the topic of astronomy. When the guy easily wins it’s revealed he is in fact a space enthusiast in his spare time.

At this point the stupid characters reach a disgusting level with a parody of a soap opera called “The Bald and the Beautiful… Oh and Fitzy”.

The final round was a barefoot race on an obstacle course. Brigitte and Nobbi were required to collect slime from one end of a tarp and transport it to the other end. In three minutes Brigitte managed to collect 2.45Kg but was beaten by Nobbi who collected 4.15Kg. After Nobbi is awarded with his trophy, Big Brother wishes David a happy birthday and announces a party is waiting in the BB house.

The FNL hosts reveal that Nobbi broke the rules earlier today by dressing up as David and entering the house. BB calls Saxon to the Diary Room and asks him to deliver Nobbi’s prize to him – $20,000 Zimbabwe dollars. Nobbi is called to the Kombi Diary Room and is informed by BB that the current exchange rate from Zimbabwe dollars to Australian dollars is 20,000:1 and encourages him to spend his money wisely.

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