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The Bachelors AU 2023

February said:
Now will Felix really want to spend the rest of his life making cups of tea? Clinking tea cups instead of champagne glasses?
Time to move on!
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Definitely not. I think he will be the one to not propose at the end of this, and lo and behold will be announcing his single status at the conclusion of the show airing.
 
Oh, my god. That was torture. I don't think Thomas is into Jasmine, nice creek though. I don't think blonde Jessica is into Felix. That "conscious conversation" was as bad as her bullshit to Felix over tea (teabag still in cup). I.cannot.stand.the.way.she.speaks.and.enunciates.every.word. WTF?! It's worse than her faux "open relationship". Bring back Tash!

(Where was Jed's solo date? And Krystal got one lousy glass of wine! Where was her finger food?!)
 
Way too much time wasted on the non-existent thruple.
So did Jess go with the option to dump her boyfriend, or the one to try having two boyfriends, despite Felix's eyes almost bugging out in revulsion at having to share saliva with Damian.

Jed was screwed out of his airtime tonight, apart from spontaneously drumming to break up the tedium.
 
I saw online that someone referred to Jed as a Drum Baby, which I think is hilarious despite liking him.
 
There was no narrative justification for Tash being back.

She just... changed her mind? Over the course of 2 episodes?

Jed is smitten, but interestingly, I thought I heard Thomas say "she's bad news".
 
Getting a bit over all this "I've got a strong conection to you " business! They all have it for all of them!
 
So, are there going to be intruders this year? I thought I read something about that, but it's looking unlikely. Maybe it was just Tash!
 
Good decision not to let Tash back in.
She confirmed she was just there for the fame when she said she'd stay for Thomas instead.

The women on this show are far more thirsty than Jed or Thomas were prepared for.
 
Finally, Felix was trying to fend Tilly off, and she didn't like it and finally, he's thinking with his big head and not his little head!
 
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Whoever said she was mesmerising is right. But she's ridiculous going on this show and having all these "conscious conversations" about a situation that is incompatible with the stated premise of the show.

Hooray, Felix booted Tilly!
 
Good result.
I mean Krystol still doesn't have a hope in hell, but at least she's a nice person.

Tilly forgot to wear the arse-cheeks in her dress.
 
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