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Clawson
- Thread starter Columbo
- Start date
lafirenze
Active Member
I think it's rich that Cat felt horrible about it the next day and tried to play the emotional card. I think she'd annoy me the most if I was in the house, simply because her overly-emotional demeanour is something I find irritating. Lawson's approach was a little more cutthroat, but at least he's accepted it and won't try to take it back. Own up to what you just did!
Also, if Lawson really did barely get back together with his girlfriend just before the show... that is awful for him. Because he was probably emotionally distant from her before going in, but it was made to appear as though they had been together lovingly without any problems. It's the Ross and Rachel situation, sort of!
Yeah, I find it selfish. Personally, I'd end a relationship if I saw that I wasn't interested in it anymore. It's scary to think that people can do things like that so easily.
Also, if Lawson really did barely get back together with his girlfriend just before the show... that is awful for him. Because he was probably emotionally distant from her before going in, but it was made to appear as though they had been together lovingly without any problems. It's the Ross and Rachel situation, sort of!
Yeah, I find it selfish. Personally, I'd end a relationship if I saw that I wasn't interested in it anymore. It's scary to think that people can do things like that so easily.
Pretty sure the feelings were mutual. They were both after each other.
Secret terrorist! Google knows... Tony Abbott is coming for you...
I don't get it, I tend to be in relationships where neither part gets sucked into some complete self dependent, whole identity relies on it and so you can't break free. I also am capable of entertaining myself, being alone and single. I don't need to have a girlfriend, it's great but yeah. Some people just need a relationship. And they're the worst people because they will excuse everything to get in them which a large part of that being how they are being treated or how they will treat the other person.
MsBunnie
Furry and Fabulous
My whole marriage has been based on maintaining both a sense of coupleness AND a sense of individual identity and independence. It's worked well for us for over 21 years. I really scratch my head when girlfriends say 'I have to ask my husband' before we commit to going to a movie or something...like what do you mean by 'ask'? Check if nothing is on yes, but ask? as in permission? Nup.
des moines
Well-Known Member
No comprehende. This is is twisting things. The person who is doing the CHEATING is usually the person who cops the most flack. You know, because they're the one cheating. Preeeetty sure cheating on someone is worse than chasing someone.
GalPal
Well-Known Member
@des moines I am talking about BB - this year and last year. Both Tully n Cat were doing the chasing. I am not saying that the men aren't encouraging it, but the fact is the majority of viewers crucify the chaser, is it because they are women.....could well be. Cheating is bad form, but so is chasing someone who is taken.....they r the same imo.
MsBunnie
Furry and Fabulous
I do think Cat is wearing the blame on this as the chaser. If Lawson was chasing Cat then the internutz would be blowing up the opticfibre cables with their outrage and indignation.
lafirenze
Active Member
I just find that the people who desperately need to be in a relationship are the ones who have some issues of their own they need to work out first. I understand why people are attracted to relationships - I'm in one now and I'm extremely happy - but when you're young, why rush into being attached to another person before you need to be (ie marriage/long-term settling down)? It's just odd to me. I think I understand Cat's point of view considering she's much older, but hey, she went for a TWENTY THREE year old so I'm not so sure age is her issue!
Also, I say this as someone who's Lawson's age. No need to get all crazy about being with someone!
Bratty
Newb
I just don't get the "he's or she's more to blame than the other" thinking. He was in a relationship. She knew he was. He cheated, she chased. Both are equally responsible. They are both supposedly adults who know right from wrong. They both messed up bigtime and I'm sure they'll regret it.
How much of it is 'asking' versus just seeing if they were wanted for something? Kind of a way of telling them? Although there'd be a lot of grey area I am sure.
I'm 30 now and haven't observed this for a fair while, but I remember back after high school and early 20s you'd know people who were dating guys that literally wouldn't let them do anything with out them. You just felt like taking them aside and being like, 'you're young, don't put up with this shit.'
The worst case I remember was only when we were 19 or so. Immature stuff, but it always stuck with me A mate from school had a last minute big afternoon into evening bbq, pool party. Everyone was people who went to high school together. Maybe a couple of outside partners. One of the girls was dating some guy also from high school. As it was last minute, her boyfriend was at work. She left him a message saying where she was, that he should drop by. A few hours later he got the message, rang her up and abused her on the phone. She was not allowed to go out with out him. Telling her how disrespectful it was, that she should have waited for him to get of work and so forth. She's off crying surrounded by the girls. You're just like, what the fuck is wrong with that guy. Heavens forbid if he ever got married. The thing is, he was always a nice friendly, fun guy. Whatever way he saw woman, this was his response. I think part of it was cutural. They then still dated for a couple years. Always stuck with me though....
As years have gone by, when ever people have tended to get in relationships with these partners, well much better, they just leave. I've got a bunch of divorced friends, because they married guys and then were not having the life they wanted. A whole, 'what happened to studying, working, saving money and then seeing the world.' When the guys were like, nope, babies now.
Agreed. The only time chasing is worse, is when the person is taken and also not responding back to the chasing it but the person is still chasing anyways. But if the person responds to the chasing and are taken- well eff that. You're the douche, no arguments needed.
I basically repeated what you are saying I realise, but this was in reference to also clarify my opinion on this post.
I can't view them the same. Yes cat is very wrong for chasing a taken guy, but ultimately, it's lawson that can put his foot down and not entertain the idea of the chasing. He didn't and he is the one in the relationship and the one that will hurt his gf. Cat is the unknown woman to his gf. At the end it will be lawson that hurts her because of his actions like his weakness to cherish a relationship and his lack of guts to not be in one if he was not really committed anyways.
I think it's getting pretty obvious that Lawson was not "all in" with regards to his relationship... and it's easy for a lot of people to say that that makes him a prick... but not everyone has it in them to use the "ripping off a bandaid" approach to ending relationships. The whole situation of having one foot in, one foot out, seeing what else is out there (sometimes not even all that consciously) might incite the masses to point the finger, and start talking about scarlet letters and what not... but it's common, and even normal I'm afraid. Seriously common... it's lucky that all we do is trash people for this kind of thing instead of hanging them for it.
When you're in any kind of situation you don't think you want to be in... you look for an exit. When you're in a situation that you're not sure whether or you want to be in... you at least look around to see where the exits are in case you need to use them. You may feel like you can't walk out that exit without getting a sense of what your options will be, and what your life could be like, once you do. In relationships, it absolutely sucks for the people involved... especially the one who has been wronged. But there's still no truly evil person in the mix, no matter how much an army of bystanders try to demonise them.
I was not fond of Cat's emotional card either. I think that she should have just held it together, and not been swayed by a bunch of people for whom it's none of their business anyway. If she had too much of a conscience for any of it to happen in the first place, well great. But to be fine about it going into the Sanctuary, fine coming out, and then falling apart because of what the mob has to say about it? I think I have less respect for that part of it than anything else. That, and her over eagerness towards Lawson, when he is barely scratching the surface of reciprocation anyway.
natalia
Well-Known Member
I'm not saying lawson isn't to blame. But in this case I think cats the bigger betrayer.... she knows how girls feel, she knows how much she's breaking another girls heart, she was the one who actually spoke up about it on national tv and keeps going for him by taking him to a private bedroom and pashing him under the covers.
Yes he went with her, yes he kissed her back but for god sake putting her gender aside she is 8 years older than him, she should know better.
They are not equally to blame... he is a horrible person but she is significantly worse
I just now found your post and went and had a look at the link. Wow... that is very weddingy indeed!
Candice has good taste, there are some beautiful images there. Although, can you imagine the situation, if this has not been such a stable relationship recently (on again off again), and Lawson was already unsure whether it has a long term future or not... while at the same time her Pinterest account looks like that? That account is wedding overload... almost like she doesn't have any other interests to pursue.
When one person is unsure about their relationship, and the other is picking out china patterns, that's kind of a disaster waiting to happen.
des moines
Well-Known Member
You're right, they're not equally to blame. Lawson is the person in the relationship, Lawson is the one who committed a betrayal. If one is worse than the other, it is without question the person doing the cheating. Not the person he's cheating with. Such double standards, it's sickening.
natalia
Well-Known Member
Oh MY GOD seriously.... my opinion wont be changed about this.... Don't bring this load of shit double standards talk. This aint double standards its the truth.
Cat is a home wrecking bitch.
Lawson is a massive ass but the fact that cat keeps on initiating it is what's worse.
AS A GIRL, which I am.... i would bitch slap the whore who was to constantly tell my man she liked him even when he had told her HE couldn't do anything for her but yet she went on top of him in the pool trying to act all 23... bitch is 31 years old and wrecking a 23 year old girls relationship.
Lawson would be dumped and erased if he was my boyfriend but cat...oh hell to that bitch.
Last year with drew and tully I blamed them both equally as they were both initiating it but this year I can see Lawson would never have done anything wrong if Cat hadn't constantly been acting like a teenage skank, kissing his ass and being all cry cry I HAVE GENUINE FEELINGS FOR YOU waa waa waa.
Grow up woman. Even as an older person she should know better than to play around with lawson who she's only known for 30 days. Her brain should have said NO the day she heard he was taken yet she still went on and on about her feelings.
Now you keep going on about how you find my opinion hard to understand...
pawlini
I've got the power
I don't agree with you. Cat was the one pushing it from the start. She told him to his face she had feelings for him, she then chose to take him to the sanctuary while drunk. She should not go after someone who is attached. N.O. Full stop!
des moines
Well-Known Member
Your opinion is "hard to understand" because it's a load of bullshit based on double standards and an astounding lack of logic, and anyone with even a pinch of reason can see how nonsensical your stance on this is.
It says a lot about you that you'd rather bitchslap the theoretical woman your theoretical boyfriend theoretically cheated on you with, than you boyfriend who actually, you know, cheated on you. When you're in a relationship, and your partner cheats on you with someone you've never even met, the only person who has betrayed you is your partner. The other person, the total stranger, never owed you anything. The person who made a commitment to you, however, THEY did. Cat is a dog for doing what she did, but she didn't betray anyone. Anyone with a bit of common sense and perspective understands this.
Lawd. The great extents people will go to in order to make cheating men less accountable for their actions is truly bizarre.
It says a lot about you that you'd rather bitchslap the theoretical woman your theoretical boyfriend theoretically cheated on you with, than you boyfriend who actually, you know, cheated on you. When you're in a relationship, and your partner cheats on you with someone you've never even met, the only person who has betrayed you is your partner. The other person, the total stranger, never owed you anything. The person who made a commitment to you, however, THEY did. Cat is a dog for doing what she did, but she didn't betray anyone. Anyone with a bit of common sense and perspective understands this.
Lawd. The great extents people will go to in order to make cheating men less accountable for their actions is truly bizarre.
des moines
Well-Known Member
Lawson told Cat he felt the same way about her. Lawson accepted her invitation to the sanctuary. Lawson said he would sleep in the same bed as her. Is Lawson a toddler who can only do what he's told, or is he an adult who is capable of making his own decisions who made the wrong one and now needs to be accountable for it?