I blame the sun. It just keeps coming up and going down again, and everytime it does, a new day comes with it. It is squarely the sun's fault time refuses to stand still.
The grief that comes with loss is at times unbearable. I am so desperately sorry you lost your child. To be honest, I can't even get my head around it.
I remember visiting a client back when I cleaned houses for the aged. She was easily in her 80's. Her 4 year old daughter was killed after being hit by a car on a family picnic. I asked her if it gets easier to bear over time. She said "once you lose your child your heart breaks and it never heals, and nor would I want it to, because I get to feel her every day..."
Do you dream of your son? I still see and hear my Dad in my dreams. Though sadly I don't dream of him much anymore. In my dreams we never have much time, and we always have to rush what we are doing. I love seeing him. Maybe tonight I will.
Happy New Year Shaydee. I am thinking of you.