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The Psychology/Body Language/Personality Thread

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
Watch this on SBS
http://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/video/608475715863/how-to-find-love-online

Disregard the title, it is more about what attracts us to one another in general.
And, in the 2nd half, there is scientist who has conducted ground breaking research around dopamine & serotonin in individuals and how this predicts compatibility.

She hasn't published yet, but this could be rather astonishingly effective for match-making.
Dopamine predominate people, opposites attract and suit; serotonin people need similar types.

Anyway, I am going to rewatch as I only saw the end bit.
Coincidence it popped up when we were discussing this topic. Very interesting about how to attract people online.
And they test the brains of twin brothers to reveal interesting stuff.

Thank you for that. I shall watch it later. I have heard a bit about the chemistry stuff before.
 

kxk

SAPIOSEXUAL
It was so funny how it popped up, exactly when we were having this discussion.
The twin stuff was interesting, one is in a relationship & in love, the other is single and searching. CAT scans of the brains revealed interesting stuff.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
Chemistry is very interesting.

I have always wondered if chemistry can work online. Or do you need to be physically in the room?
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
Watch this on SBS
http://www.sbs.com.au/ondemand/video/608475715863/how-to-find-love-online

Disregard the title, it is more about what attracts us to one another in general.
And, in the 2nd half, there is scientist who has conducted ground breaking research around dopamine & serotonin in individuals and how this predicts compatibility.

She hasn't published yet, but this could be rather astonishingly effective for match-making.
Dopamine predominate people, opposites attract and suit; serotonin people need similar types.

Anyway, I am going to rewatch as I only saw the end bit.
Coincidence it popped up when we were discussing this topic. Very interesting about how to attract people online.
And they test the brains of twin brothers to reveal interesting stuff.

Watched it. The romantic in me does not like the science behind it. But I suppose it can be hard to argue against numbers.

I thought the piece about the written profile was interesting. How men should be more brave than nice on their profile. And how they should choose a username in the A-M range.

I have done that chemistry test before online. I got negotiator which is estrogen. Apparently my best match is director which is testosterone.
 
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Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
I don't usually respond to these kind of posts, but if no one else is going to...
Taking you on your word that this bit was serious and not random nonsense or baiting, I don't think I've ever heard anyone express this before. Certainly not a male at least. Care to elaborate?

When I was at school I had lots of male friends. No female friends. As I grew older I had no friends. Only people I chatted with online. Which were 99.9 % male. At first I found it fun. Over time though I began to find it dull. So I decided to leave that type of environment.

Then I came on here. Which seems to be 70-30 female. I found the posters more interesting. The topics more nuanced. I was lucky to be able to interact with one of the most fascinating people I have ever met online or off in inigo montoya. Her influence on my life can not be underestimated.

How so? Well during my brief time being friends with her i felt happy. Happier then I was when i was interacting with men. Interacting with her i could feel i could just be myself. I didn't feel i could do that with men.


So yes I would kill myself if i was friends with a man again. That is not to say i hate them. Just that if i would choose based on gender i would rather choose a woman.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
I think it is safer for the moment for me just to psychoanalyze myself. Probably more accurate too.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
My next Toastmaster's theme will be about happiness. Which will be a good subject to talk about. Not only at Toastmasters but in this thread.

So what makes you happy? This question is open to everyone. I will post my answer later.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
I could post a heap of materialistic things that make me happy. Lists and lists of them. But that is only surface level happiness. Stuff that makes you feel good for a while. But then that moment is gone. Lost in time. Instead I will just list five things that make me truly happy.

- Experiencing great art. That could be listening to a Tina Arena song. Or that could be watching an Alfred Hitchcock film. Whatever the medium whenever I see or hear something I truly love the hairs on every part of my body stand up. I took a online test yesterday that identified your top strengths. The top one for me was 'Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence". Which is what I identified when I did a similar test at my psychologists. I think that suited me quite well.

- Seeing people that I care about, deeply care about, be truly happy. That makes me happy. If they are sad that makes me sad. My emotions are silent yet deep.

- Thinking of a great story to write about. From that moment the idea enters into my mind until I type that last word. That inspiration that makes mee feel so happy.

- Being friends with someone. Whenever this be online or off. Offline better though I feel.

- Performing. I enjoy that. I can be someone else.
 

Bluefin

No-one
The Golden Triangle makes people happy! I thought it referred to mind altering, herbivore produce of South East Asia's equivalent of a Willy Wonka Chocolate factory, but NO....

And Tasmanians are apparently in the happiest of Australians. Still think it has something to do with green things...

'Golden triangle' of happiness: Study finds three simple things needed for a happy life
By William Verity and Yasmin Parry, Updated 17 Oct 2015, 11:13am

What makes us happy:
  • Relationships: Being part of an intimate relationship is the most vital component of wellbeing. Pets are no substitute for human beings.
  • Financial control: While money does not make us happy, a lack of it makes us miserable. Wellbeing rises up to about $100,000 a year, at which point its healing power drops off dramatically.
  • Sense of purpose: People are happiest when they are active, and when they have a sense of purpose. Volunteers are amongst the happiest people, though conscripts are not.
The report found fathers tended to be happier than men without children, but women's happiness stayed the same whether they had children or not. The researchers said this could be because family was the greatest source of contentment and happiness for men throughout their lives, whereas women were able to maintain social connections beyond the family unit. Not only that, but those parents who had regular contact with their mother and mother-in-law reported being happier overall.

Resilient in face of ill health
Another surprising finding was that good health is a far less powerful predictor than expected. Provided that declining health is slow, rather than traumatic, our in-built genetic resilience compensates for that and our general mood level stays the same.

Golden oldies the happiest
This may go part way to explaining why Australians over the age of 55 were the most contented cohort, while the least contented were informal carers of sick or disabled family members. Their general level of mood happiness came at the bottom of the index, along with prisoners and homeless children.

State of happiness: Tasmania
Where we live in Australia has little impact on our happiness, although there are slight variances across the country. Tasmania came out as the happiest state in the nation, whereas Western Australia had the lowest wellbeing score, just above New South Wales. Those of us who live in rural and regional areas tend to be the happiest Australians, suggesting that Tasmanians might be happiest because of the state's low population.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
The Golden Triangle makes people happy! I thought it referred to mind altering, herbivore produce of South East Asia's equivalent of a Willy Wonka Chocolate factory, but NO....

And Tasmanians are apparently in the happiest of Australians. Still think it has something to do with green things...

'Golden triangle' of happiness: Study finds three simple things needed for a happy life
By William Verity and Yasmin Parry, Updated 17 Oct 2015, 11:13am

What makes us happy:
  • Relationships: Being part of an intimate relationship is the most vital component of wellbeing. Pets are no substitute for human beings.
  • Financial control: While money does not make us happy, a lack of it makes us miserable. Wellbeing rises up to about $100,000 a year, at which point its healing power drops off dramatically.
  • Sense of purpose: People are happiest when they are active, and when they have a sense of purpose. Volunteers are amongst the happiest people, though conscripts are not.
The report found fathers tended to be happier than men without children, but women's happiness stayed the same whether they had children or not. The researchers said this could be because family was the greatest source of contentment and happiness for men throughout their lives, whereas women were able to maintain social connections beyond the family unit. Not only that, but those parents who had regular contact with their mother and mother-in-law reported being happier overall.

Resilient in face of ill health
Another surprising finding was that good health is a far less powerful predictor than expected. Provided that declining health is slow, rather than traumatic, our in-built genetic resilience compensates for that and our general mood level stays the same.

Golden oldies the happiest
This may go part way to explaining why Australians over the age of 55 were the most contented cohort, while the least contented were informal carers of sick or disabled family members. Their general level of mood happiness came at the bottom of the index, along with prisoners and homeless children.

State of happiness: Tasmania
Where we live in Australia has little impact on our happiness, although there are slight variances across the country. Tasmania came out as the happiest state in the nation, whereas Western Australia had the lowest wellbeing score, just above New South Wales. Those of us who live in rural and regional areas tend to be the happiest Australians, suggesting that Tasmanians might be happiest because of the state's low population.

Very interesting indeed. i have none of the three at the moment.
 

kxk

SAPIOSEXUAL
Well I lived in Tassie for about 10 years - that stuff about them being happy is utter bullshit.

They have one of the highest, if not THE highest rates of young male suicides in the world.
Very high unemployment, zero population growth.
There are people in Tassie that have never been outside of Tassie, i find that so weird.

It is NOT a cheery place, maybe the way the 2 largest cities detest each other makes them feel better.
It is actually quite depressed.

They probably surveyed the transplants, the place is littered with mainlanders who have made a tree change and run all the B&Bs.

As a transplant, I did find it nice surroundings and a great place to study - because there are no distractions, not much to do.

Oh and it is noticeable they miss out on the Aussie beach, summer, sun culture.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
Well I lived in Tassie for about 10 years - that stuff about them being happy is utter bullshit.

They have one of the highest, if not THE highest rates of young male suicides in the world.
Very high unemployment, zero population growth.
There are people in Tassie that have never been outside of Tassie, i find that so weird.

It is NOT a cheery place, maybe the way the 2 largest cities detest each other makes them feel better.
It is actually quite depressed.

They probably surveyed the transplants, the place is littered with mainlanders who have made a tree change and run all the B&Bs.

As a transplant, I did find it nice surroundings and a great place to study - because there are no distractions, not much to do.

Oh and it is noticeable they miss out on the Aussie beach, summer, sun culture.

I don't think I could live back in Tasmania again. The colder climate excaerbates my asthma. I wind up getting sick more often.
 

Bluefin

No-one
Well I lived in Tassie for about 10 years - that stuff about them being happy is utter bullshit.

They have one of the highest, if not THE highest rates of young male suicides in the world.
Very high unemployment, zero population growth.
There are people in Tassie that have never been outside of Tassie, i find that so weird.

It is NOT a cheery place, maybe the way the 2 largest cities detest each other makes them feel better.
It is actually quite depressed.

They probably surveyed the transplants, the place is littered with mainlanders who have made a tree change and run all the B&Bs.

As a transplant, I did find it nice surroundings and a great place to study - because there are no distractions, not much to do.

Oh and it is noticeable they miss out on the Aussie beach, summer, sun culture.
Haha. Well, they must have found all the needles in the haystacks then - the green imports instead of the the misery guts demo/geographics.

It mentions higher happiness in rural/regional areas too, so obviously didn't survey farmers, nor depressed country towns.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
Haha. Well, they must have found all the needles in the haystacks then - the green imports instead of the the misery guts demo/geographics.

It mentions higher happiness in rural/regional areas too, so obviously didn't survey farmers, nor depressed country towns.

do you think happiness is overrated? i do.
 

Columbo

Somehow I Still Believe
I think it's nice to be happy, and not nice to be greedy. Nor to depend on other people, materialism, wealth or any external source tooooo much to 'achieve' it....

because external forces can easily collapse in a snap of a finger? (people leave, posessions rust, and money can turn into dust)
 
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