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R U OK Support Thread

delcan said:
I'm ok with myself most days. I make it through. I've done a lot in my work I am proud of and that other people compliment me on. I try to embrace that and to try feel ok about myself. But most nights (at least 5 nights a week), I have vivid dreams where I am a failure. So I feel like a failure every day of my life because of these dreams. I am not sure if you can control dreams
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This article suggests maybe you can control dreams.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-control-dreams/
There are a few paragraphs that you might find helpful.
You might consider getting some professional help to make it happen though.
It would be wonderful to stop the dreams, but have you got support in the meantime? Have you got someone you can hash these feelings out with?
 
Just got home from having an epidural (no I'm not pregnant) and cortisone injection in my spine for back & leg pain.
The good news is I feel fine and the only support I need is in case I fall over before it wears off. And that bright pink dye all over my back is gonna be a bugger to wash/wear off.
 
Meglos said:
Just got home from having an epidural (no I'm not pregnant) and cortisone injection in my spine for back & leg pain.
The good news is I feel fine and the only support I need is in case I fall over before it wears off. And that bright pink dye all over my back is gonna be a bugger to wash/wear off.
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Mate, not good. Hope the injection works and you're tickety boo soon. How long are the effects meant to last? I've started saying tickety boo. I'm lame, I know, lol. It's not as if it's mid Summer and exposed skin is the done thing. It will get there...eventually.
 
Fiona said:
Mate, not good. Hope the injection works and you're tickety boo soon. How long are the effects meant to last? I've started saying tickety boo. I'm lame, I know, lol. It's not as if it's mid Summer and exposed skin is the done thing. It will get there...eventually.
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Thanks Fiona. I'm supposed to stay off my feet and not lift anything for a few days. I'm still feeling a bit drowsy but I'm also not supposed to lie down for as long as I can avoid it. They reckon the pain may come back temporarily, but then within 1-2 weeks it will subside, for up to 3 months. So then I'll be tickety-boo.
 
Meglos said:
Just got home from having an epidural (no I'm not pregnant) and cortisone injection in my spine for back & leg pain.
The good news is I feel fine and the only support I need is in case I fall over before it wears off. And that bright pink dye all over my back is gonna be a bugger to wash/wear off.
Click to expand...

Hope you're feeling better soon. Back and leg pain sucks and messes with your head. I hope things start moving in the right direction for you
 
qtkt said:
This article suggests maybe you can control dreams.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-control-dreams/
There are a few paragraphs that you might find helpful.
You might consider getting some professional help to make it happen though.
It would be wonderful to stop the dreams, but have you got support in the meantime? Have you got someone you can hash these feelings out with?
Click to expand...
I feel for those that have bad dreams.
I find my dreams to be awesome and very happy, even better than living in my current life. Maybe that could be a problem. I feel better in sleep, with my dreams than the approaching real life. mmmmmmmm.

I suppose I have a happy place, even if it is not reality?

Gosh, that does sounds bad and not with reality :(

Now questioning myself, by indulging in my dreams ........
 
I’m sure it doesn’t hurt to indulge in your happy place as long as you’re not avoiding dealing with reality. Previous posts of yours @joyjoyjoy would suggest that you deal with the real stuff - often very proactively.
 
@delcan You can have some success with dream designing ......methods vary, all over the net
Basically you kind of self hypnotise, using a pattern

You write down what you wish to dream about, and daydream it in your head, make it as real as you can
Keep on repeating this every night, and your dream patterns should change.

Writing stuff down, can be practical lists, we all dream of our daily life stuff, and sort things in one part of our sleep before we move on to fantastical stuff.

And if all else fails............... i recommend taking up 'herbs', seriously never remember dreams, very rare to recall even one
'Herbs' helps my RA at night,my doctors recommend it
RA is on the secondary medical use, means it will not be available to me for years free

I only have a bit at night, helps my joints, inflammation and aids sleep, dreamless......
I could not tolerate the stuff when I was younger
 
kxk said:
@delcan You can have some success with dream designing ......methods vary, all over the net
Basically you kind of self hypnotise, using a pattern

You write down what you wish to dream about, and daydream it in your head, make it as real as you can
Keep on repeating this every night, and your dream patterns should change.

Writing stuff down, can be practical lists, we all dream of our daily life stuff, and sort things in one part of our sleep before we move on to fantastical stuff.

And if all else fails............... i recommend taking up 'herbs', seriously never remember dreams, very rare to recall even one
'Herbs' helps my RA at night,my doctors recommend it
RA is on the secondary medical use, means it will not be available to me for years free

I only have a bit at night, helps my joints, inflammation and aids sleep, dreamless......
I could not tolerate the stuff when I was younger
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Thanks @kxk.
 
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I was horrified by your story @delcan........honestly.......you are a good person and deserve peaceful, restful sleep
and very rare for me to recall a dream, but when i do strangely different to younger dreaming

I have had maybe 1 or 2 freaky dreams I recalled over the last 10 years, and i noticed how I was logical in coping with horror, so the freaky dreams didn't freak me out.

I had a job where I noticed I was waking up with clenched fists from stress.
 
qtkt said:
I’m sure it doesn’t hurt to indulge in your happy place as long as you’re not avoiding dealing with reality. Previous posts of yours @joyjoyjoy would suggest that you deal with the real stuff - often very proactively.
Click to expand...
ummm if I am totally honest, and I have to be with you, I do not really deal with real life stuff very well, these days. I am sad to say this. I am a procrastinator. When push comes to shove, and action is needed and required, I usually respond very well.

I find every day life is very difficult to deal with. I find Solace in my Garden and getting dirt every where and up me nails etc. Sort of grounds me and puts me in a happy space. Living day to day here, and to find something sprouted in my garden is godsend. I find life tough, but I live day by day.

 
Meglos said:
Thanks Fiona. I'm supposed to stay off my feet and not lift anything for a few days. I'm still feeling a bit drowsy but I'm also not supposed to lie down for as long as I can avoid it. They reckon the pain may come back temporarily, but then within 1-2 weeks it will subside, for up to 3 months. So then I'll be tickety-boo.
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How are you doing?
 
kxk said:
@delcan You can have some success with dream designing ......methods vary, all over the net
Basically you kind of self hypnotise, using a pattern

You write down what you wish to dream about, and daydream it in your head, make it as real as you can
Keep on repeating this every night, and your dream patterns should change.

Writing stuff down, can be practical lists, we all dream of our daily life stuff, and sort things in one part of our sleep before we move on to fantastical stuff.

And if all else fails............... i recommend taking up 'herbs', seriously never remember dreams, very rare to recall even one
'Herbs' helps my RA at night,my doctors recommend it
RA is on the secondary medical use, means it will not be available to me for years free

I only have a bit at night, helps my joints, inflammation and aids sleep, dreamless......
I could not tolerate the stuff when I was younger
Click to expand...
This must be why I have happy dreams. I don't write them down, but think about good stuff I would like during the day.

What is RA?
 
joyjoyjoy said:
ummm if I am totally honest, and I have to be with you, I do not really deal with real life stuff very well, these days. I am sad to say this. I am a procrastinator. When push comes to shove, and action is needed and required, I usually respond very well.

I find every day life is very difficult to deal with. I find Solace in my Garden and getting dirt every where and up me nails etc. Sort of grounds me and puts me in a happy space. Living day to day here, and to find something sprouted in my garden is godsend. I find life tough, but I live day by day.
Click to expand...
It seems your posts about your garden are the ones I’ve remembered. I am struggling to word this correctly and I don’t mean to reduce years of your life into a paragraph but ... I remember you sharing some time ago about being in a really tough place and you changed your whole life and your garden was part of that. I really respect that you had the courage to do that when many people can not. I apologise if I made it sound like I thought you had found the ‘cure-all’. There is no such thing and I believe you when you say you still face daily struggle.
Sometimes, though, we don’t always notice we we have made a proactive step to improve things for ourselves. You may indeed procrastinate but sometimes you don’t. I’ve noticed the posts that talk about when you do take charge and admire you for them. It doesn’t matter how quickly we move forward, it’s just important that we manage to take that next step at some stage.

By the way, I’m a procrastinator too. A bad one. So many times I only respond to stuff under immediate deadline pressure.
 
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