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Bachelor In Paradise 2018

FatPants said:
No episode tonight which is annoying. We will have to wait until tomorrow.
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sav0001 said:
Yep no episode because it's Easter Sunday. This week it will be on Monday and Tuesday then from next week it will run Sunday-Wednesday.
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Meglos said:
Bloody Easter, what are we tv addicts supposed to do?
MKR coming back "AFTER THE COMMONWEALTH GAMES", whatever that means.
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...aw fuggit! fuggit!... FUGGIT!!!!!... the mongrels!!!!!!!!!!...

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...how can they do this to us?????... I've so been waiting for Jarrod to turn up and everything!... no seriously I have!... what was that?... "bullshit!"?????... why won't anybody believe me when I say that?... oh okay... I admit it... I'm not... but still... the mongrels!!!!!... cheers.
 
Meglos said:
Oh no Mr Sticky, Michael is one of the worst.
It's ok if you like him... but give him time, and I don't think you will.
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Meglos said:
Some background on Michael
https://www.smh.com.au/entertainmen...d-after-the-bachelorette-20160106-gm0lzy.html
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...oh okay Meglos... so he just a shallow publicity seeking famewhore would-be-if-he-could-be just like the rest of them eh?... but!... he sounds like a bit of a bastard to me too... so I'll like him even more now!... lol!... or at least until he shits me off anyway lol!... cheers.
 
...so there is no episode tonight eh?... why don't we script our own one?... I'll start it off if you like... a sort of interweb episode...

...**show opens with the intro**...

Nina:... "hey Tara... Keira... it's been at least 10 minutes since either of you have cried... you're both overdue for one and besides... Tara is one cry ahead of you Keira so you need to 'up your game' if you want more airtime sweetie!"...

Tara: ..."oh golly gosh!... thanks for reminding us Nina... you're such a good friend... it's good to see that you've got our backs!"...

Nina: **says under her breath** "yes... but only to put knives into them you flosshead!"...

Luke:... "hey look everyone... it's Jarrod walking in!"...

Leah:... "what the hell?... are you still actually here Luke?... hi Jarrod!"...

Jarrod:... **thinking to himself**... "oh wow!... Leah was the first female to speak to me!... SHE'S THE ONE!... I'M IN LOVE!"...

...Jarrod walks towards all of them and brushes them all aside one by one and makes a course directly to Leah without speaking to anyone else...

Jarrod:... "Leah!... you spoke to me first!... I love you!... will you marry me?"...

Leah:... "oh golly gosh!... this is all so sudden!... of course I will!"...

...after that sudden exchange Keira then bursts out into tears...

Keira:... "bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!... he was going to be mine!... I wanted to be the one chained in his dungeon below his orchard for the rest of my life!!!!!... bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!"...

...Keira runs off into the sunset along the same beach where Jarrod got dumped by Sophie with a couple of the other Bachelors and bachelorettes chasing after her to console her... all except Tara...

Tara:... "what a bitch Keira is... now we're even with the 'cry' tally... now I've got to think of another reason to cry about something... BITCH!"...

...meanwhile... Mackaine is in the background blending in with the wicker lounge suite...

Mackaine:... **thinking to himself**... "gee!... I might get my guitar out and serenade some of the girls... you never know... one of them might 'put out' after hearing my golden voice!"...



...please feel free to add you're own script to the 'show' if you wish lol!... cheers.
 
Blake : I give my rose to, ugh, ummm, (dammit what's that chick's name who threatened to break my balls if I ever grow a pair?) L...Ll...LLL...LLLL.... oh who am I kidding, can I give my rose to Blake? Oh SHIT, I said that aloud,

Laurina : I'm screwed.
 
Meglos said:
Blake : I give my rose to, ugh, ummm, (dammit what's that chick's name who threatened to break my balls if I ever grow a pair?) L...Ll...LLL...LLLL.... oh who am I kidding, can I give my rose to Blake? Oh SHIT, I said that aloud,

Laurina : I'm screwed.
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...bwahahahaha!... the worrying part about your storyline is that it'll probably come true Meglos!... lol!... cheers.
 
delcan said:
But this show doesn’t end up with “blanking” or “winning”. It’s just the last couples left and if they last. Are you talking about “Are you the One?”??
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By winners I mean the ones who last the longest as a couple and hopefully after the show. It would be great for it to happen.
 
The broadcast guide is pretty strange. Checked the Foxtel guide and it will be shown 4 days in a row pretty soon.

Monday 2/04
Tuesday 3/04

Sunday 8/04
Monday 9/04
Tuesday 10/04
Wednesday 11/04
 
Mr Stickyfingers said:
...I actually don't mind this designated in show commentator guy...
BiP_Bio_Michael_small.jpg
... Michael... he seems to be the least douchiest of them all to me delcan... what was he like in his previous Bach series?... a decent guy or a dickwad?... I didn't see that season... cheers.
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I like him too. Did not mind him very much on Sam Frost's season of The Bachelorette. Very good choice, @Mr Stickyfingers .
 
Jarrod and Keira will last for eternity. Every drop of rain, every flower that blooms, and every bird that sings underneath the early morning sun represents their eternal love. Their souls are intertwined forever more. True love. Just like Clawson.
 
I like Michael too, I didn't get the backlash against the guy, he never did anything scummy, he has no convictions, he has a decent brain = ie he never says YOUSE etc, and is attractive & fit.

What I find quite weird, nobody has a nice voice....I rather love a well spoken man, and a deeper voice than anyone ever on this show.
They have boy voices mostly, funnily Jarrod has a better speaking voice than a lot of them.
 
Well I expect Keira would absolutely LOVE Jarrod's obsessive type of affection and devotion, and compared with a lot of very boring dudes who all seem to have commitment issues, girlfriends, or criminal records - Jarrod is a catch, and he loves love
 
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