@Lucas, smartly dressed in his black suit but groggy eyed with a trace of dribble on his chin, walked across the sparsely furnished room with it's lack of home comforts and,being careful not to disturb the sleeping blue cat who was snoring quite contently on a beige stool that stood about three foot high from the red carpeted floor, made his way to the front door. The door handle, a golden circle, felt cold and harsh to him. He looked at his watch, a Christmas present from his sister. She had gotten the watch while she was in New York with the latest of her boyfriends. A Mark or a Marcus. He wasn't sure. It was years since they had spoken. They just hadn't had the time, or at least that's what Lucas told himself. But he knew that wasn't true. He knew that it wouldn't have taken him five seconds to give his sister a call. They were all they had of each other. The rest of their family had died off. Mother from brain cancer, father from a heart attack. An uncle who shot himself. Lucas and his sister were the only ones left in the family. That should have meant something to him, that should have inspired and motivated him to become a better brother, hell it should have inspired him to become a better person. But it didn't. They drifted apart after their mother's funeral. They sent Christmas presents to each other, but they were often ill thought of or clearly something that had been re-gifted. They only rarely if ever spoke on the telephone. Lucas was busy at his job working at the local fish and chip shop while also studying his law degree, and his sister was enjoying traveling the world too much to pick up a phone. Was he too lazy? Maybe. But he also felt that he shouldn't have to keep in touch with his sister right? I mean it was just family. A family doesn't have to mean flesh and blood. It can be like a family of close friends. Lucas knew he was wrong, he knew that so much. He knew that because his sister was dead and it was his fault.
He pictured her sister laughing at the park when they were kids. It was a family outing. Either Christmas or Easter. Or maybe it was a birthday. He couldn't remember, there were just so many of them. But he could never forget the image of his sister, with her fiery red hair and her toothy smile which reminded Lucas of Luna Park, laughing at their father. Laughing so hard and so freely, without a care in the world, at their father who was making silly faces. She was so happy then, so full of zest and vigor. He recalled how she tried to catch him when they were playing tag. But he was always too fast for her. He would zig and zag his way through the thick branches, dodge and weave his way on the vast playground in the park with it's many slides and swings, and he would hide behind mother and father who were busy preparing the snags for the evening tea. No matter how hard she chased, she could never catch Lucas. But it didn't annoy or frustrate her. She just kept on chasing him no matter how tired she was. Lucas would often ask her, sometimes in a mocking tone but other times in a more brotherly way, if she wanted to have a rest. If she just wanted to take a break. But she would look at him, with her dull grey eyes and small dainty like nose, shake her head, and start chasing him yet again. That's what he loved about his sister, she never gave up and she never gave in.
Lucas' thoughts suddenly shifted to a few days ago. He was just coming through the door having just been for his weekly grocery shop, when he heard the phone ring. He quickly raced inside, dumped his pile of groceries on the floor, stubbed his toe on the stool, and answered it. It was the hospital, his sister was hurt. Could he come? Of course, he said. He moved quickly to his car and raced to the hospital. The road was a blur, but he had arrived there safely. Lucas quickly raced up to where they were keeping her. He saw a young man out of the corner of his eye, crying and shaking with his head in his hands. Lucas saw the doctor come up to talk to him. The doctor's face told him everything. He couldn't move when he heard the news. A car crash. Drunk driver. Nothing we could do. He wanted to throw up but he couldn't. He wanted to cry, but no tears came. The doctor tried to reassure him, to give him some comfort. But they just went in one ear and out the other with Lucas. All he could think about was that he was the only one left in the family. Just him. And it hurt him so. It hurt him that his sister was dead. It hurt him that he was the only one left in his family. It hurt him that he could not weep for her. It hurt him that he was alone. It hurt him that he could have prevented this, that maybe if he was closer to his sister, maybe if he picked up the phone more often she might still be alive. He knew that was crazy, but that's how he felt.
Lucas awoke from his murky thoughts. He turned the door handle and walked outside to his run down blue car with its patchy car cover seats and odd fishy smell. He glanced upon a magpie, struggling to get a piece of food from the ground, and smiled softly to himself as he put his eulogy in his pocket and drove off into the distance.
