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Things That Make You Laugh

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This piece from Joe Hildebrand in the Daily Telegraph today made me chuckle.

EXCLUSIVE: HOW TO SPEND $470,000 AT ONCE
IT WAS revealed this week that the Prime Minister will be paid $470,000 a year after getting a massive pay rise along with other politicians.

This is obviously an obscene amount of money to waste on the highest office in the land. Just to put it in perspective, here’s a list of other things you could buy for $470,000…

.

*An hour’s parking at Sydney Airport;

*Two monthly repayments on a typical Baulkham Hills home;

*Peter Slipper’s expense account;

*An ironic bowl of breakfast cereal at a hipster cafe;

*A bottle of $25 wine in an eastern suburbs restaurant

*The light fittings on Larry Emdur’s yacht;

*4,700 easy payments of $99.99 on the Ab-Circle Pro;

*235,000 items at the two dollar shop;

*A daytrip to New Zealand for Kevin Rudd;

*An afternoon snack for Darrin;

*Two tickets to Andre Rieu;

*A return train ticket to Sydney Airport;

*A cab ride to anywhere in the Sydney CBD;*

*One kilo of bananas (October prices);

*470,000 kilos of bananas (November prices);

*Two coffees at Circular Quay;

*Two drinks at The Ivy;

*The Elvis Costello box set;

*The entire budget of Nicolas Cage’s last three films;

*Fifteen minutes with Shane Warne’s dentist;

*An hour’s worth of cocaine for Charlie Sheen;

*An original Luke Skywalker action figure if it’s still in the box;

*A one-way ticket home on Virgin on the day of the Qantas strike;

*A standard residential energy bill;

*Half an hour of Alan Joyce’s time;

*A bag of Jaffas at Hoyts;

*Brunch in Bondi;

*A one bedroom bedsit in Lithgow;

*A $19 Vodafone wireless internet plan;

*A pair of secondhand jeans in Newtown;

*A Melbourne Storm player;

*Australia, The Movie;

*Australia, The Tourist Destination;

*Australia, The Currency;

*Mark Latham, the journalist;

*A sandwich at Sydney Airport;

*The entire New Zealand armed forces;

*470,000 litres of milk from Coles or Woolies;

*A year’s supply of hair products for Baz Luhrmann;

*The rights to the next 12 seasons of The Renovators; or

*A night out with Ian Macdonald.

.

*NB This is only providing the journey also commences somewhere in the Sydney CBD.
 
Given his stance, this inadvertent double entendre from Fred Nile in this quote (from this SMH article) also made me chuckle.


"I thought it would happen, going by the lobbying and the penetration of the Labor Party by homosexual activists and homosexual individuals," he said.
 
Um, a renovator's delight close to the city with consistent rental returns you say?

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More:

http://www.realestate.com.au/property-house-qld-chelmer-107984976
 
Today I laughed at the fact that the douche that wants to censor the internet said "fuck" on national telly.
 
Why Home Alone could never happen now.
 

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When you boil an egg & end up with a willy...
 

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This very creative ad resulted in a lot of extra free publicity, pretty bloody smart agent in my opinion.
 
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