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Housemate #5 TULLY!

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jooles_x said:
Agreed. I hate the 'ombre' thing, too. It just looks like bad regrowth.
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See I always thought Ombre was light on top to dark on the bottom. Which would look intentional. This is the first I've seen the other way and I do not care for it! Hahaha!!!
 
Max Power said:
Most of us who want to keep her in the house aren't so ridiculously melodramatic about the whole thing as if it's doing 'damage' to her and talking as if she won't be perfectly fine when she gets out beyond having to deal with a relationship problem like most people on the planet a fair few times in their lives. She will be perfectly fine and beyond sometimes having natural frustrations from the unusual situation she's in she is going well.
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I think saying we're being melodramatic is unfair. A lot of people have genuine concern and have been in similarly unhealthy relationships or been around similarly unwell people (or have been unwell and exhibited similar behaviour ourselves) and can spot those warning signs. I hope that she is ok and will be ok, but from what we've been shown, especially in yesterday's live feed, there is definite reason for concern - for both her and Drew. It may even be really poor and selective editing, on which case the producer's should change what they're doing because the conversations yesterday were quite triggering. If Drew is cracking it all the time, they need to show that, or they need to intervene in what is a very unhealthy scenario, and offer both of them support so they don't repeat these behaviours with people on the outside.

Not melodrama, concern.
 
Queen Alla said:
I think saying we're being melodramatic is unfair. A lot of people have genuine concern and have been in similarly unhealthy relationships or been around similarly unwell people (or have been unwell and exhibited similar behaviour ourselves) and can spot those warning signs. I hope that she is ok and will be ok, but from what we've been shown, especially in yesterday's live feed, there is definite reason for concern - for both her and Drew. It may even be really poor and selective editing, on which case the producer's should change what they're doing because the conversations yesterday were quite triggering. If Drew is cracking it all the time, they need to show that, or they need to intervene in what is a very unhealthy scenario, and offer both of them support so they don't repeat these behaviours with people on the outside.

Not melodrama, concern.
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This, precisely. We're discussing it a little in the LF thread again now, but it's exactly as you said; people who've been in an abusive relationship are seeing the loud warning signals. It's not wrong to be concerned for Drew.
 
^^There's really nothing that isn't a perfectly natural result of people spending 100% of their time together in a confined space with no break, every now and again they aren't in the cheeriest mood and get snippy so that's what we're shown. I've said before it would be the same even for lifelong best friends and the vast majority of the time they're perfectly fine.
 
Max Power said:
^^There's really nothing that isn't a perfectly natural result of people spending 100% of their time together in a confined space with no break, every now and again they aren't in the cheeriest mood and get snippy so that's what we're shown. I've said before it would be the same even for lifelong best friends and the vast majority of the time they're perfectly fine.
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f this is the case then I think Tully and Drew should just be snuggle buddies only - they can hang out during the day but they should be around other people. Someone in that house needs to mention it to them.
 
Max Power said:
^^There's really nothing that isn't a perfectly natural result of people spending 100% of their time together in a confined space with no break, every now and again they aren't in the cheeriest mood and get snippy so that's what we're shown. I've said before it would be the same even for lifelong best friends and the vast majority of the time they're perfectly fine.
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Have you watched the arguments between Drew and Tully and then their goodnight chat? It's not just being snippy at each other, or even just having fights. It is more how it plays out and the content of said arguments that is disturbing. And not just the arguments, but everything in between. You've said previously if they backed off a little from each other they would be fine. The problem is that they are unable to do that. She had to sit and watch him while he had a shower. Any time he does something with someone else, she brings it back to her, especially where it concerns Jade, but also when Tim did the fake birthday. Her reaction to that and to Drew was completely overboard. Yes others were pissed off. But she took it to the next level: "you humiliated me in front of Australia." And it's clearly not just Jade that the issue lies, ALL of the housemates have commented on not being able to get to know or talk to Drew because of Tully. They've all commented on her meltdowns. Her extreme reaction to other housemates is somewhat laughable, but also very telling. If it was just ONE of these things or things happening rarely there probably wouldn't be concern, or if all the housemates behaved like this. But it's the constant and ongoing nature of her behaviour, and in start contrast with every other contestant that has been on Big Brother, that raises cause for concern. You can brush it off if you wish, but those with experience of unhealthy behaviour and relationships know that it isn't worth the risk of brushing it off as nothing.
 
rachael92 said:
f this is the case then I think Tully and Drew should just be snuggle buddies only - they can hang out during the day but they should be around other people. Someone in that house needs to mention it to them.
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Yeah I've said that before, spending a bit of time apart wouldn't hurt and really Tully only seems to have a problem when it comes to Drew and Jade. But really a little bit of squabbling every now and then isn't even nearly the big problem some people are making it out to be and of course that's just what gets the most attention.
 
Queen Alla said:
Have you watched the arguments between Drew and Tully and then their goodnight chat? It's not just being snippy at each other, or even just having fights. It is more how it plays out and the content of said arguments that is disturbing. And not just the arguments, but everything in between. You've said previously if they backed off a little from each other they would be fine. The problem is that they are unable to do that. She had to sit and watch him while he had a shower. Any time he does something with someone else, she brings it back to her, especially where it concerns Jade, but also when Tim did the fake birthday. Her reaction to that and to Drew was completely overboard. Yes others were pissed off. But she took it to the next level: "you humiliated me in front of Australia." And it's clearly not just Jade that the issue lies, ALL of the housemates have commented on not being able to get to know or talk to Drew because of Tully. They've all commented on her meltdowns. Her extreme reaction to other housemates is somewhat laughable, but also very telling. If it was just ONE of these things or things happening rarely there probably wouldn't be concern, or if all the housemates behaved like this. But it's the constant and ongoing nature of her behaviour, and in start contrast with every other contestant that has been on Big Brother, that raises cause for concern. You can brush it off if you wish, but those with experience of unhealthy behaviour and relationships know that it isn't worth the risk of brushing it off as nothing.
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This 100%. People who have been in that situation see it for what it is. Tully needs help before it gets worse. Also Drew's reactions are very telling. It shows the dysfunctional and unhealthiness of their codependent dance.
 
Queen Alla said:
Have you watched the arguments between Drew and Tully and then their goodnight chat? It's not just being snippy at each other, or even just having fights. It is more how it plays out and the content of said arguments that is disturbing.
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It's just petty stuff, and the way I see it they're just easy targets to vent frustration sometimes rather than anything genuine. I don't think it's a situation where you can begin to try to compare it to 'normal' relationships and draw any conclusions, of course it would be completely different outside the Big Brother house.
 
Max Power said:
It's just petty stuff, and the way I see it they're just easy targets to vent frustration sometimes rather than anything genuine. I don't think it's a situation where you can begin to try to compare it to 'normal' relationships and draw any conclusions, of course it would be completely different outside the Big Brother house.
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I understand your point of view, but these are classic examples of textbook abuse. It's nothing very serious (yet), but anyone who has been in the situation knows exactly where it can lead to. You have to cut that shit out before it has time to develop.
 
murf said:
I am COMPLETELY fed up with her. I wish she would just leave already!
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But according to the live feed she tells Heidi that if she is evicted they will have to "drag her out of there."

Alrighty then! I wonder if they are taking applications for this position.
 
murf said:
I am COMPLETELY fed up with her. I wish she would just leave already!
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Yup, I'm the same. I don't care anymore, I just want her gone. I don't care what's wrong with her or why she is the way she is. She is an adult and knows full well how to treat people. I don't care if she is a basket case or that she may have problems, she is not above others. Just get her out.
 
CaspersMum said:
But according to the live feed she tells Heidi that if she is evicted they will have to "drag her out of there."

Alrighty then! I wonder if they are taking applications for this position.
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Haha i'm sure a few of us would happily volunteer for that position. I'm free today and Dreamworld is only 45 minutes away.
 
Max Power said:
Most of us who want to keep her in the house aren't so ridiculously melodramatic about the whole thing as if it's doing 'damage' to her and talking as if she won't be perfectly fine when she gets out beyond having to deal with a relationship problem like most people on the planet a fair few times in their lives. She will be perfectly fine and beyond sometimes having natural frustrations from the unusual situation she's in she is going well.
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I don't get it. In some posts we (those who don't like her behaviour) are being accused of 'hate' and told that the hate is 'disturbing' and being told we are the type of people who can send someone to commit suicide...and now are just being melodramatic and none of this is a big deal and Tully will come out and be just fine. They seem opposing ideas to me

I hope she comes out and sees how she has been perceived by many (from what I can tell the majority) and she uses this to learn and grow. To me it will take a significant change for her to be open to feedback and to really just stop and listen and apply an attitude of taking it on board without being defensive or considering it insult for the sake of insult but realise there are valid issues with her behaviour. She is still young enough to take something fantastic from this experience. What an opportunity to get absolute honest feedback about yourself that you can use to become a better person and enhance your future.
 
jooles_x said:
I hate her, but I think she has a pretty face -- when she's not scowling and frowning and acting petty.

View attachment 33166
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I think she looks sweet in that pic (obviously if I mentally ignore the personality I know she has). I might be old fashioned but I'm not into the ombré thing. In fact I didn't know it was anything beyond regrowth until joining this post. Hopefully she will go back to one colour as it suits her IMO.
 
Chump said:
I don't get it. In some posts we (those who don't like her behaviour) are being accused of 'hate' and told that the hate is 'disturbing' and being told we are the type of people who can send someone to commit suicide...and now are just being melodramatic and none of this is a big deal and Tully will come out and be just fine. They seem opposing ideas to me
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Yes the idea that she's damaging herself with her closeness to Drew or that it's an 'abusive' relationship is being melodramatic, and the fact she may have to deal with bullying when she gets out is a concern.
 
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