I think I'm still recovering after my cousin's engagement party on Saturday night.
Someone pass me a Panadol. Or another Champagne Sunrise. Whichever.
Someone pass me a Panadol. Or another Champagne Sunrise. Whichever.
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General O/T Chit Chat Thread
- Thread starter mutleyp
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Hello ratbags!
Got a work story for you!
I have noticed a lot of nurses wear granny cords attached to their reading glasses and I just assumed it was because they were scared of losing them. Let’s just say, the other night, as my glasses slid gracefully from my head into a steaming hot poo, I had an epiphany of sorts, and it suddenly became crystal clear as to why….
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Even though my glasses have been sterilised within an inch of their frames, I still can't bring myself to put them on my face!!!!!!
Got a work story for you!
I have noticed a lot of nurses wear granny cords attached to their reading glasses and I just assumed it was because they were scared of losing them. Let’s just say, the other night, as my glasses slid gracefully from my head into a steaming hot poo, I had an epiphany of sorts, and it suddenly became crystal clear as to why….
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Even though my glasses have been sterilised within an inch of their frames, I still can't bring myself to put them on my face!!!!!!
...hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah... **Sticky takes a breath**... hahahahahahahahahahahaha!... funny funny funny!... Trala... just a tip... if the frames of the glasses are brown I'd give them another couple of rinses... just saying... funnyest thing I've heard for ages... cheers.
Topaz
Active Member
Topaz
Active Member
Lucky you have more glasses!!
Perhaps write yourself a cryptic note to keep with the offending glasses as a reminder.... just in case.
Mr coops has this^^^^ Maybe I should get some of the notes for him?
Someone yells STOP!
Do you:
a) Collaborate and listen
b) Hammer time
c) In the name of love
d) And stare
e) Right now, thank you much
Discuss.
Do you:
a) Collaborate and listen
b) Hammer time
c) In the name of love
d) And stare
e) Right now, thank you much
Discuss.
I do believe the correct answer is b) Hammer time.
80's child here
and now I have ALL of those songs in my head!
SeanE
I loathe sport on TV...
I do believe the correct answer is b) Hammer time.
80's child here
and now I have ALL of those songs in my head!
Yes b) is most appropriate but c) would be acceptable as well.
I have had a super Friday myself. I had yesterday and today off work and today I met up with a group of my favourite girls at the Coffee Club at Mooloolaba and had morning tea which lapsed into lunch. It was decided that I would get a short bob cut next Friday, which is both nerve racking and exciting at the same time. The way I carry on about my hair you would swear I had flowing enviable locks instead of fine thin candy floss hair...
I love girlfriends so much!
Hey I will share my status update for yesterday with you. The 2.5 posters in here who like me will get a giggle, the 347 posters in here who hate my guts will find joy in my predicament, so it should be win/win for everyone!
Well I have been through what can only be described as a First World Ordeal!
My dog somehow managed to swallow one of my hairs (from my head people, keep it clean) and about halfway through our walk today he is in all sorts of trouble trying to shit it out. He has a dog shit attached to what looks like fishing line hanging out his arse. After much jiggling and shaking it becomes apparent to me that I have to pull this thing out! So carefully using forefinger and thumb I pull the hair from his arsehole and manage to get dog shit all over my digits in the process, I wiped what I could on the grass, but still brown remained. A normal thinking person would assume the horror ended there, but sadly it was going to get worse.
Given that I am half hour from home I have no choice but to keep on trucking. All I need to do now is remember that I have dog shit on my finger and thumb and not touch anything, how hard can that be? 15 minutes later while completely immersed in my music and the beautiful day, I can smell dog shit, takes a further few minutes to register the possible danger at hand. I look down and I have smeared dog shit like skid marks all over my ipod! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
At this point I just have to pray I didn't touch my face or put my fingers in my mouth, because let’s face it, if I am going to learn anything from this ordeal, it has to be that I can’t trust my own memory! I guess if I suddenly start foaming at the mouth tomorrow or randomly sliding my arse across the mat I will get my answers.
Well I have been through what can only be described as a First World Ordeal!
My dog somehow managed to swallow one of my hairs (from my head people, keep it clean) and about halfway through our walk today he is in all sorts of trouble trying to shit it out. He has a dog shit attached to what looks like fishing line hanging out his arse. After much jiggling and shaking it becomes apparent to me that I have to pull this thing out! So carefully using forefinger and thumb I pull the hair from his arsehole and manage to get dog shit all over my digits in the process, I wiped what I could on the grass, but still brown remained. A normal thinking person would assume the horror ended there, but sadly it was going to get worse.
Given that I am half hour from home I have no choice but to keep on trucking. All I need to do now is remember that I have dog shit on my finger and thumb and not touch anything, how hard can that be? 15 minutes later while completely immersed in my music and the beautiful day, I can smell dog shit, takes a further few minutes to register the possible danger at hand. I look down and I have smeared dog shit like skid marks all over my ipod! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
At this point I just have to pray I didn't touch my face or put my fingers in my mouth, because let’s face it, if I am going to learn anything from this ordeal, it has to be that I can’t trust my own memory! I guess if I suddenly start foaming at the mouth tomorrow or randomly sliding my arse across the mat I will get my answers.
Right I am off to fight the good fight (in other words act like a tard with the other tards) in the forum trenches. No doubt there will be at least one post trying to fire me up again, let's face it, it doesn't take much to get me started and I do LOVE the sound of my own voice...
Ha!
Ha!
Topaz
Active Member
You seem to be getting a collection of items that need to be put to the side..... your glasses and now your ipod!!!!
What's that saying?
Oh yeah.... Shit Happens!!!!
They say lightening never strikes twice but in your case I think it has.
You seem to be getting a collection of items that need to be put to the side..... your glasses and now your ipod!!!!
What's that saying?
Oh yeah.... Shit Happens!!!!
They say lightening never strikes twice but in your case I think it has.
Ha!
I know!
Do you think God is trying to tell me that I give people the shits?!
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