BBUK: The return of… (spoilers)

... and a dash of ???

THE LAST FORTNIGHT

Two weeks since our last BBUK update, and surpisingly nobody has been kicked out for intimidating, unacceptable or aggressive behaviour since – but two have gone through the front door in the usual way.

First it was Jen vs Rex – the final round in the big fight that was “picture gate” – and Jen’s over reaction cost her her place in the house, with 90% of viewers booting her out – but not before she spent the week getting soaxed with fishy water as part of the Human Zoo task.

And with the boys now outnumbering the girls 2:1, it was time to send in Australian PA Sara, model Maysoon and 44 year old Belinda Belinda Belinda to even out the numbers.   The additional females were welcomed by all – with suspicion and conspiracy theories.

Moving on and BBUK came up with another simple, but quite brilliant, task for the housemates – punching their way out of a paper bag.   It turned out to be harder than it sounds, especially for Lisa – who took longer than all the winning team put together to punch her way out.

The main weekly task though had one thing written all over it – failure!   The housemates were set a seemingly impossible Irish Dancing challenge, which turned out to be seemingly impossible, with Big Brother announcing he’d lost count of the number of challenges.

On to eviction number 4 and it was time to split up a couple as either Mario, one half of Mario and Lisa – the couple who entered the house together, went head to head with Rebecca, one half of Luke and Becs, who despite claiming to absolutely despise each other share a bed – and got rather intimate, well, as intimate as a non-swearing, non-drinking, non-smoking 20-year old politician is willing to get on national TV.

But for Mario his talking down to his girlfriend meant the audience had refound their early hatred of him, and with 77% of the vote he got the boot.   And despite spending four weeks telling us he’d done it all and going on about “health and safety”, he still didn’t get the comparison to David Brent.

But now – on to the twist, and it’s two twists in one   (SPOILERS:  The following has not aired yet in the Daily Shows)

Neither are new to worldwide BB fans, but it’s the first time they’ve been done together.  This week the housemates had to elect a Head of House.   This wouldn’t be decided by a battle of endurance or a true of false quiz – but blatant bribery and campaigning as the three candidates, Darnell, Dale and Luke, competed to win the votes of their fellow housemates – and Luke was quick to find out he wasn’t as popular as he thought.

The morning after a secret ballot the housemates were thrown an election breakfast in the Task Room as they awaited the results, unaware what Big Brother was up to in the house.  THE DIVIDE IS BACK!

With Howard, Dale getting 3 votes, Marsden, Luke Christian Thomas, getting just 2, it was Swallow, Darnell, who was duly elected as the first Head of House with 9 votes.   As well as immunity from eviction, he’ll be responsible for numerous decisions throughout the week – and his first, sending half the housemates to hell.

Darnell chose Dale, Rex, Mohammed, Kat, Rachel and Maysoon to live in Heaven, and have access to the luxury bedroom, pool, bathroom and more luxurious side of the house.

The others – Luke, Rebecca, Sara, Belinda, Stuart, Lisa and Mikey are therefore condemned to a week in hell – sleeping in the infamously uncomfortable “B Block”, with cold showers outside and only the essentials.   They have got access to the house kitchen though – too cook and wait on the heavenly housemates.

Apart from Darnell being immune, it is still unknown how the HoH and Heaven and Hell split will affect nominations – or what further decisions the HoH may have to make.   However, there are rumours he’ll have the power to send housemates to solitary confinement – and to make certain housemates nominate in front  of each other.

Whatever happens, as far as I’m concerned it’s a long overdue return of the rich/poor divde – and though perhaps hell could be a bit more hellish, so far it’s looking good and most importantly, is already leading to resentment from those sentenced to a week of hell.

For more BBUK news and rumours visit BBSPY.co.uk.  Pictures courtesy of Digital Spy.