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Housemates

Day 33 Uplate

9 June 2005

Posted by Tim

11.57pm – I join Uplate to hear lots of heavy breathing and panting among Michelle and Glenn! The two are grinding under the blankets. Michelle moans a little, Glenn repositions himself and the panting continues. They pash over their microphone.

Meanwhile Kate, Greg and Vesna are in the kitchen. Vesna is popping pimples in her face. Dean asks Vesna if she every asked as a fluffer. Vesna asks what it is. Dean says its some one who puts the fluff in ugg boots. Vesna wasn’t one of those. She thought it was something to with porn (I’m pretty sure it is). Rachael explains a fluffer is the person who gets porn stars “excited” for their shoots. Dean and David are sitting together and David lets out a very smelly fart. Vesna is just hearing what a fluffer is and wants to know why Dean thought she would be one. Hotdogs is amused at what a fluffer is – he didn’t know what it was before. Kate says she doesn’t need to be “tweaked” by a fluffer. He nipples are so sensitive to the cold – she gets turned on easily by them. Hotdogs says Kate is very attractive. Greg says she is attractive, and Kate says “go tell that to your brother”.

After the ad break Mike is purposely stalling on the brain teaser so they don’t show the action between Michelle and Glenn… hrmph! He jokes about jerking and relieving tension lol! Trust an ad break and a brainteaser to be jammed in over the most exciting part.

12.08am – The heavy breathing has become a little more relaxed and it seems Glenn is now lying on Michelle, going to sleep. He is rubbing her cheek while she kisses his hand occasionally. They start pashing again, it’s like sloppy noodles being poured over the microphone. Michelle lets out a little moan again. Nope.. it’s well and truely over now as Michelle rolls over and Glenn spoons her. Michelle says “I love you”. Glenn’s response is muffled but it sounds like “I love you too”. A little later Geneva pokes her head up to see whats going on. She then sits up and takes off some of her clothes, which stirs Christie. Christie gets out of bed.

12.21am – A few housemates in the kitchen. Hotdogs is giving Vesna a lot of attention, joking about groping her. Dean is talking about something that is 10 inches (lol!). They joke about Vesna being a whore – she doesn’t like it! She says since she’s walked into this house the converstations back been about dicks dicks and dicks. They talk about anal sex and Vesna says they shouldn’t put it where it doesn’t belong. Vesna is now on Hotdog’s lap and he’s practically begging for a hug. Vesna explains if she goes to a party there will be plenty of guys who will want to talk to her but that doesn’t mean she wants to talk to every guy – only selective guy. Hotdogs says he finds her attractive and he’s confident. Vesna leads on a joke about Hotdogs being her husband. Vesna then says there is a pimple on Dean’s chest and she needs to pop it – he pulls away while they play-wrestle to get to the pimple. She eventually gets to it and he says it fucking hurts. Dean says to Hotdogs “your missus is a nutta!”. Dean explains a very lame pick up line: calling some one over with your finger and saying “I just made you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with two” (cue lame trumpet wah wah wah).

12.26am – More pickup lines(?). David is talking about saying he has a huge boner, can you help me out by putting it in your ear? He then says one to Kate “I just looked at you and it went straight up. Kate is giggling. Dean: “my knob just said he wont go down until you suck it”.

Haha! Mike Goldman puts his phone playing the BB ringtone in his mouth and “wah wah waahs” the theme – very funny. Apparently some DJ has been spreading rumours about him and Mike being a couple – reow!

12.37am – Glenn and Michelle are awake and are facing away from each other now! Guilt? Who knows. Kate seems to be whispering with Dean and Greg, asking if her bed is empty. She lies down inbetween them. They all gossip about Michelle and Glenn. Dean makes pigeon noises at the couple (they have named them the pigeons). Kate explains Michelle was making moaning noises before. Dean and David are amused and gossip like highschool boys. Meanwhile Michelle is positioning her hair and lying down to sleep. Dean says this week has gone really quick, and wonders if they should go to sleep. Kate tells Dean he’s not allowed to leave them this Sunday.

12.47am – Kate, Dean and David are talking about the task, and how one couple in particular was given all the food tasks (not sure which one). Apparently one housemate was picking their nose while cooking in the task. Some one tells the three they are trying to sleep – I think it’s Hotdogs. David gets up farts right near Michelle and Hotdogs. There is a whole lot of muffled giggling while Michelle gags and tries to wave it away. Hotdogs goes and joins the threesome on Dean and David’s bed. They tell Kate to go do a fart this time. The original fart has now wafted over to their bed and they all laugh and cover their faces with pillows. Some one lets out a fart – a very loud one! They all laugh again. It was Dean this time. Rachael enters the bedroom and David says “oh Rachael did you fart?”. David says “I think I shit myself”. Rachael gets into bed, not amused. The foursome are now plotting something else to do but it’s impossible to hear.

12.53am – They all agree they should start trying to get to sleep now.

1.06am – Dean and David have just decided to go to sleep. Dean sleeps with a pillow right between his legs in his groin… weird. “This is Big Brother. Tim to the diary room”. Tim gets out of bed and Mike tells us it’s a battery change.

We don’t go back to the house tonight, but Mike does let us all know his producer is a friend of dorothy. Dreamworld says goodnight at 1.41am.